Your Training Checked a Box. It Didn’t Build a Culture.

A rainbow sticker on a door is not a safe space. Neither is a single 90-minute workshop, a slide deck full of definitions, or a well-meaning email announcing your organization is “committed to inclusion.” Real safety, the kind that actually changes how people move through a space, is built. And most organizations that reach out for LGBTQIA+ training don’t yet know what they’re building toward.

For over ten years, I’ve worked as a consultant and educator through Mx. Kelley Queer Education LLC, delivering LGBTQIA+ training, cultural competency training, and Belonging and Engagement programming to colleges, universities, medical institutions, businesses, and corporations. I started this work in 2016, at a time when there was almost no structured education available on sexual orientation, gender identity, and the broader LGBTQIA+ experience outside of the Safe Zone framework. That framework had been built on college campuses since the early 2000s, developed independently by student activists and educators at institutions across the country.

People were left to piece together whatever they could find online, and I felt that gap personally. I had just finished my BA and was heading into a Master’s program to dig deeper into a field I was already passionate about.

By the time I finished my Master’s in 2020, the path forward was obvious. I had the education; I had run several freelance trainings, and the only way to know if I was truly fit for this work was to put myself out there and build a business around it. Alongside building this business, I’ve continued my own education: I’m currently a doctoral candidate researching gender development within human sexuality, and I’m a certified sexologist. That ongoing research and credentialing directly shapes the trainings I bring into the room, keeping them grounded in current scholarship rather than static talking points.

Ten years later, I’ve worked with enough organizations, campuses, and professionals to see a clear pattern: most people who reach out for training aren’t sure what they actually need. They know they want something, but the language around LGBTQIA+ training, Safe Zone training, and cultural competency training tends to blur together. So here’s how I break it down, why the distinction matters, and what’s actually at stake if you get it wrong.

The Cost of Getting It Wrong

Before we talk about what good training looks like, it’s worth sitting with why this work matters more than a checkbox on a compliance form. According to the CDC’s 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey, LGBTQIA+ students face bullying at nearly twice the rate of their heterosexual peers, along with markedly higher rates of dating violence and sexual violence. Separately, the Trevor Project’s 2026 Project SPARK Interim Report found that transgender and nonbinary youth report anxiety and suicidal ideation at roughly double the rate of their cisgender peers. And discrimination isn’t a rare event: the same Trevor Project report found over half of LGBTQ+ young people report experiencing discrimination because of their sexual orientation, a number that climbs even higher for transgender and nonbinary people specifically.

The flip side of that data is where hope lives. That same Trevor Project research found that when LGBTQIA+ young people feel supported at school, when they have access to affirming adults and mental health professionals, and when they’re connected to community, their outcomes shift measurably; reported support from friends alone nearly doubled in environments that actively cultivated it. That’s not a coincidence. That’s what structured, sustained education makes possible, on a campus, in a clinic, or in a workplace.

Meanwhile, most organizations aren’t as far along as they think. Pew Research Center found that fewer than half of U.S. workers report participating in any DEI training in the past year, and Glassdoor survey data shows a meaningful share say their employer’s stated values don’t match what they experience day to day. So, when a college, hospital, or company reaches out asking for “the training,” the honest answer is usually: which one? Because chances are, you haven’t had the one that actually builds anything.

Foundation Training: The Root of Everything Else

This is where I consistently see the biggest gap, even among professionals already working in this field. Nobody, not even seasoned practitioners, is ever fully “done” learning the terminology, research, and delivery methods this work demands, especially as the field itself keeps evolving. New research, new language, and new frameworks emerge constantly, and a facilitator who isn’t actively keeping up with that research is teaching from an outdated map.

Foundation training covers the basics: sex, gender, gender expression, sexual orientation, and sexuality as a whole. These aren’t LGBTQIA+-specific concepts. Every person, regardless of identity, has a relationship with all of them. A strong foundation training names where heteronormativity and cisnormativity show up, and from there, unpacks what LGBTQ2SIA+ identity is, where it comes from, and how all of these pieces connect to the full human experience.

This is also where I intentionally slow things down. Terminology alone isn’t understanding. It’s easy to hand someone a glossary and call it training, but real foundation work means walking through why the language exists in the first place, how it evolved, and how it shows up differently depending on generation, region, culture, and lived experience. I bring in current research, real data, and applied examples so people aren’t just memorizing vocabulary; they’re building a framework they can actually reason through when a situation isn’t covered by a definition.

Foundation training also meets people where they are. Some groups walk in with almost no prior exposure to this content, and others have pieces of the picture but gaps they don’t know exist yet. A good foundation session adjusts for both without talking down to anyone or assuming a baseline that isn’t there.

More often than not, foundation training is where people realize what they actually need more education on. It’s the starting point, not the finish line, and it’s the training that makes every other training that follows actually land.

Safe Zone Training: Understanding the Lived Experience

Safe Zone training is a term most people recognize, so I use it deliberately. Once someone has a foundational understanding, this training goes further: it uses data, statistics, and lived stories to help people see the full picture of what daily life looks like for LGBTQIA+ people, alongside the history of the community itself.

This is where the training stops being conceptual and starts being human. Statistics on mental health disparities, discrimination, and access to care matter, but on their own they can feel distant. Access to mental health care is a good example of why: a U.S. News/Trevor Project analysis found that even among LGBTQ+ young people actively trying to get help, the share who reported being able to access care dropped from 80% to 60% within a single year, largely due to cost, fear of not being taken seriously, and fear of involuntary hospitalization. A number like that means very little until you pair it with what it actually looks like for a specific student, patient, or employee to hit that wall. That’s what shifts how people show up afterward. Participants leave not just knowing facts, but understanding the weight behind them.

From there, Safe Zone training moves into skill-building. Why do we need “safe spaces” or “brave spaces,” and how do we actually create and sustain them without slipping into performative gestures? A rainbow sticker on a door is not a safe space. A safe space is built through consistent behavior, accountability, and a willingness to be corrected. That requires a real shift in mindset and active participation in inclusion and psychological safety, which is where trauma-informed care, emotional intelligence, and applied interpersonal communication come into play.

I also spend real time on the difference between a “safe” space and a “brave” space, because they aren’t interchangeable. Safety is about reducing harm. Bravery is about creating room for hard, honest conversation even when it’s uncomfortable. Organizations often need both, and knowing which one a given moment calls for is a skill in itself, one that Safe Zone training is designed to build.

Cultural Humility and Competency Training

Cultural humility training and allyship training could technically live inside a Safe Zone training, but I pull them out on purpose. These aren’t add-ons; they’re their own discipline, and treating them as an afterthought is exactly how organizations end up with allies who mean well but don’t know how to act when it counts. Allyship work teaches people how to recognize power dynamics and practice bystander intervention. That means walking through real, specific scenarios: what does it actually look like to interrupt a harmful comment in a meeting, a classroom, or a break room, in real time, without escalating harm or centering yourself in the process? It also needs an action component: simulations, role play, and honest deconstruction of what performative allyship looks like versus what it means to sit in a genuinely courageous conversation. Performative allyship is easy. Showing up when it’s inconvenient, uncomfortable, or costly is the actual work, and it’s a skill people have to practice, not just intend to do.

Cultural humility is the piece that keeps this from becoming a one-time checklist. Competency implies you can reach a finish line, that there’s a point where you “know enough.” Humility assumes the opposite: that you are always learning, always capable of getting something wrong, and always responsible for staying curious rather than defensive. That distinction matters enormously in how organizations sustain this work long after a single training session ends.

Cultural humility and competency training is where engagement and belonging actually take root, and it’s the piece people most often forget is foundational to this work. In my experience, it’s also the training that determines whether everything learned in Foundation and Safe Zone training gets practiced, or quietly forgotten once the workshop is over. That practice matters at the organizational level too: industry research compiled by Creative Frontiers found businesses where employees genuinely feel included see up to 35% higher talent retention than those that don’t, and research published in the Journal of American College Health found belonging on campus is consistently tied to persistence and academic success for LGBTQIA+ students specifically. Culture work isn’t separate from the outcomes leadership already cares about. It’s the mechanism.

Finding the Right Organization Matters

Many people rely on local LGBTQIA+ nonprofits when they’re first looking for training, and that’s a reasonable place to start. For most organizations, a nonprofit can offer a solid introduction or baseline. But baseline is the operative word. Nonprofits are often stretched thin, covering broad community needs, and they may not have the bandwidth or specialization to go beyond an entry-level session. That doesn’t make them the wrong choice; it just means they may not cover everything your organization is actually looking for. Knowing the difference between baseline training and specialized training is part of finding the right fit.

There’s also a bigger conversation worth having here: many organizations searching for LGBTQIA+ training are specifically looking for it for free. And we’re at a point where free labor shouldn’t be the expectation. Some LGBTQIA+ orgs and individual educators do offer training at no cost, often out of genuine passion for the work or because they’re volunteer-run, and that generosity matters. But free doesn’t automatically mean quality, and quality doesn’t automatically mean expensive. What it means is that this work- research, curriculum development, staying current on evolving language and data, facilitation skills- takes real time and expertise, the same as any other professional training an organization would pay for without a second thought.

Before defaulting to “who will do this for free,” organizations are better served asking what kind of education and training they actually need, where their specific gaps are, and who has the depth to deliver it well. Sometimes that person or organization charges for their time. That’s not a red flag; it’s often a sign that the training has been developed, tested, and refined enough to be worth paying for. Look for someone like me: someone with the lived experience, the ongoing research, and the professional training to back up what they’re teaching, not just someone willing to show up for free.

Beyond the Baseline: Specialized Trainings

Once an organization has its foundation in place, that’s usually when the real, targeted work begins. A few of the specialized training courses I offer:

• Gender Language and Pronouns Training. This isn’t just “here’s how to use someone’s pronouns.” A two-hour session on gender language asks people to deconstruct the meaning behind the language we use to ascribe identity onto others in the first place, before we ever get to the practice of using someone’s pronouns correctly.
• Queer History Timeline Training. This training helps a group identify how the LGBTQIA+ community got to where it is today, and surfaces the generational gaps in knowledge and lived experience that often exist even within the community itself.
• Sexual Behavior, Substance Use, and HIV Risk Reduction Training. A specialized session focused on sexual health, substance use, and risk reduction strategies related to HIV, grounded in harm reduction principles rather than fear-based messaging.

These are the kinds of trainings that go beyond “Training 101” and speak directly to what a specific group, department, or population actually needs.

So, What Training Are You Actually Looking For?

When I take on new customers, whether they’re recurring partners or brand new, I start by asking questions, because most organizations haven’t been trained as thoroughly as they assume. The real question isn’t “have we had training?” It’s “what did that training actually build in us?” With the right training, facilitator, and material, education should move past awareness. It should teach people how to evaluate their own growth and put it into practice once they’re no longer sitting in the learner’s seat.

So if you’re looking for LGBTQIA+ training, Safe Zone training, or cultural competency training for your campus, hospital or clinic, business, or organization, look for a consultant who asks questions first, who wants to understand your specific spaces and people, and who’s willing to teach you how to keep learning after the training ends. That’s the difference between checking a box and building a culture.

Look for someone who has sat in the research and the lived experience long enough to know the difference between a training that checks a box and one that actually changes how people move through a space. Someone who can meet your organization exactly where it is, whether that’s a first foundation session or a specialized training your team has never had access to before. That’s the person and the training worth investing in. Look for someone like me, Mx. Jacob Kelley, Founder of Mx. Kelley Queer Education LLC.

Sources: CDC, 2023 Youth Risk Behavior Survey (YRBS); The Trevor Project, Project SPARK Interim Report (2026); U.S. News & World Report / The Trevor Project, mental health access findings (2025); Pew Research Center, DEI workplace survey (2023); Glassdoor, employer values survey (2022); Creative Frontiers, workplace inclusion and retention data (2025); Journal of American College Health, “Campus climate and sense of belonging explain the relationship between DEI initiatives and mental health of LGBTQ+ college students” (2025).